Raat Gayi, Baat Gayi

So due to my exam, I was unable to write my blog on Cowasjee, who passed away on Saturday, 24th of November. It wasn’t that I was studying hard or anything but it’s kind of an old tradition that a day before exam you do not indulge in any extra-curricular activity even if you aren’t studying. Something just keeps you busy. In my case, it’s usually family events. Or mere procrastination and excess social networking. And when it dawns on me that I have an exam the other day and I’m not prepared at all it is usually too late for any sort of damage control. When that happens I do the only thing I can do: call my friends and whine.

I have a habit of cribbing about everything to my friends. Bad weather, annoying teachers, bad grades, headaches, lack of preparation for exam the next day and what ever annoys or upsets me. Today, one of the many things that were annoying and upsetting me was the fact that I hadn’t been able to complete my blog because of the countless assignments and upcoming exams. And of course, I was whining about it to my friend.

Me: ‘Blog nahi likha mai ne Cowasjee wala :’(

Friend: ‘Write it over the weekend.

Me: ‘NO! Purani bat hojaye gi.

Now, even though I only ever corresponded with Cowasjee through emails he was, and will remain, one of those people I admired most. This admiration has doubled since his death as I found out more about his personality from people who knew him personally, sharing their memories on social networks, blogs and in obituaries. The fact that he is no more is hard for me to digest as I keep thinking that now I will never be able to see him or talk to him. But despite all the admiration, the sadness, the fact remains that I will still get on with my life and this realisation, for some reason, has shocked me again. Maybe I’m over-reacting. I don’t think I am though.

Life has become a bit too fast-paced. And even though I’m rushing along with it, I can’t settle with the fact that I’m supposed to let go everything and anything I consider worth holding on to. Everything, no matter how drastic and shocking, flies away.  There will be more events that will be more exciting, which will make me shift my focus and put this sadness behind me. Discussing it will become less and less relevant. In journalism terms ‘the news value decreases with time’. And when that happens, pushing the issue because it seems important to you can cost you ratings or circulation. The world wants hot cakes. Of different flavours.

That blog post is still on its way though. No matter how much time it takes, you will get to read it. Hopefully it’ll be tomorrow. Meanwhile, ponder over the soul searching revelations above.

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